Log in

Previous 10 | Next 10

May. 19th, 2008


(no subject)

You are Amelia Earhart

Adventurous and boundary breaking. You believe that you can do anything, and do not hesitate to take risks to achieve a big goal. You like to problem solve, when a problem comes up.

Take this quiz at QuizGalaxy.com</td>

You fit in with:

0% scientific.
60% reason-oriented.

Your ideals mostly resemble that of a Humanist. Although you do not have a lot of faith, you are devoted to making this world better, in the short time that you have to live.

Take This Quiz at QuizGalaxy.com


(no subject)

Anything good in your life comes from boldly confronting the darkness
Illusions are dangerous, and you benefit from seeing the world as it truly is.
Anything bad in your life comes from sinking to the level of those around you.
Remember to lift people up, and refuse to participate in anything petty.

Apr. 28th, 2008


I don't care for your fairytales

McGonagall's words echoed in her mind. Decide what you're going to do with the rest of your life. Just make sure it's something worthy. The world expects nothing less from you.

Apr. 3rd, 2008


In lumine Tuo videbimus lumen

All the way round Central Park
cheeks as pink as Wild Roses

COLUMBIA University In the City of New York

"informing that you have been selected fo admission to the Fu Foundation School of Engineering and Applied Science in Columbia University's 254 year."

I still can't believe it! I paid my downpayment $500 within the first 7.5 hours of finding out just in case they realize they may have sent me wrong letter. I expect You would hold me to the promise I made. 

And I, I have much farther to go
Everything is new and so unpredictable

This is so fantastic that it seems unbelievable! I can't really wrap my mind around it! I need to start studying again and and get those hibernated neurons firing!

Intubation isn't that terrifying actually; they don't actually pry open the teeth and force it down the throat.
And even though bone marrow sounds white, it actually looks deep crimson. Yesterday, I held a patient while the doctor extracted 80 millilitres of blood plus marrow from her!

Mar. 31st, 2008


tell me tell me is life just a playground

I am supposed to have one interesting and intriguing idea. I have a few. Aliens, the brain, the universe, God and the potential. The timing for male marathon runners increased about three minutes in the last fifty years and the timing for females increased by a whooping thirty one minutes. And why can't I believe that Aliens exist. I mean we have a blind spot so naturally we don't really get the full picture. We also can't see colours beyond the visible spectrum so the aliens can be coloured in a wavelength that is beyond our visible spectrum! just like butterflies! 

I keep telling myself that I can expect a rejection tomorrow  and that I am ready for one. That it wouldn't be a too much of a surpise. But I want it so bad. I listen to Rosie Thomas' all the way to new york city on repeat.  I keep thinking of how it would be like to study in those schools: Columbia and Cornell. I keep telling myself that I will fight so hard to get it, that I will work so hard to catch up, that I am willing to sacrifice my time and energy for the schools. I am afraid that if I won't make the right decisions if I get rejected.

I want to make you proud.

I want to fight for it.

Mar. 17th, 2008


The Other Side of the World

Washington University in St. Louis! You ROCK! I am accepted! 1350 out of 22000! 

I look up to them, people who aren't in top positions in companies, people who don't work in sophisticated workplaces and wear sleek dress pants and suits. It would seem much harder for them to find the motivation to wake up in the morning to go to work and do go through the dreary monotony of daily routines that involve numbers and sums of money that are out of reach. I am terrified that I will not be able to make it through if I become that person. That makes me feel pathetic, I want to see life as more than a series of achievements, a line up of milestones and a string of praises.

be kind,everyone you meet is fighting a battle: not to be lonesome.

Chuck Palahniuk:
The unreal is more powerful than the real, because nothing is so perfect as you can imagine it. Because it is only the intangible ideas, concepts, beliefs, fantasies that last. Stone crumbles. Wood rots. People, well, they die. But things as fragile as a thought, a dream, a legend, they go on and on.

Mar. 8th, 2008


left and leaving

I was reading my previous entries and remembered why I don't blog often. I sound so narcisstic, wrapped up in my own little bubble, waddling in my little puddle of misery, catharsizing about miniscule follies. and this entry is further proof of my narcissism. ahh what else..doctor who rocks! gotta love the repartee! 
and my results suck and i am a selfish cloud. and i wish that people would stop talking about eastern europe like its some third world country, and how i shouldn't go there. and the person who came up with run on lines should get a trampoline so she can bounce ideas off herself when the lines start running. assuming a she invented it. pro-feminism wOOt
and i think its terrifying to believe in heaven and hell. and comforting to believe in karma. i am horrible with punctuation. and i like the cardigans.

Feb. 28th, 2008


the animals were gone

i like puns. i am essentially a pun anyway. puns surprise you. like the candy stuck on the top of your cheek that still tastes sweet when you least expect it to. i feel like i'm living a dream. not a "live your dreams" sort of dream but a state whereby you are somewhere between waking and sleep. i go to work everyday, try not to be late, and eventually still being late, try not to bite my partner's head of and biting the insides of my cheeks so hard so i won't lash out and shriek why are you so dense. i said i believe in karma and i am afraid that i'll be at the receiving end of my snark and arrogance yet i'm not doing much to generate good karma. 
i need a break, a new shell. A new sense of pride that is stronger than my memories. I feel like I stick out, like when everyone is wearing yellow shirts and i'm the only one is blue. blue but not black. I don't want to fit into their happy little community. I don't want to be a misanthrope but I always end up choosing the latter. It is like choosing to wear the pair of shiny heels even though they are uncomfortable. 
experience. to know how it feels like. to feel what it would be like to do that. I am doing a lot of things so that I won't miss out. that is a barely good enough reason. and yet i use it to convince myself everytime. 
signs are powerful, they jump out and stare you in the face. they remind us that the world is bigger than any of us. sometimes I get too caught up and forget that. but a small sign is spine tingling. i got the first sign that You sent to me to tell me to keep trying and changing. I need a second sign to know if this is the right course. 

Feb. 16th, 2008


(no subject)

snow at my grandparents&apos; place
SNOW! at my grandparents' place!

footprints! looked like someone danced in the snow!

grandparents' new house!


Jan. 25th, 2008


Louise Bogan

Solitary Observation brought back from a sojourn in Hell

At midnight tears
run in your ears

Flawless beauty of the English Language. Hell is where people cry through their ears at midnight. You hear cries of pain and pleas for help so often that their tears become yours and you can't stop hearing them everywhere. You hears their sobs as their tears become your own. 


Previous 10 | Next 10